If You Find Your Heart Has Made A Fool Out Of You

I said I'd spend the month couch-surfing, but I've stayed firmly planted at Vincent Wilde's place on rue de Castelnau. First he built a little bed for me out of stray cushions on the floor, then he moved to a new place on the Plateau. So I'm sleeping in his old bed until the end of the month, and then it's on to the next place. A beautiful apartment in Hochelaga with hardwood floors and the original claw foot bathtub, in case you were wondering.

I need to thank everyone who offered me a place to stay, or even just kind words. I'd made a quick post on Facebook to say, "Heartbroken and living out of a backpack," and within minutes, my phone was vibrating and it didn't stop for a few days. Zinester friends from all over the world offered their thoughts (and sometimes their couches). Some people sent snail mail, and Erin Fae even phoned me all the way from New Zealand. What a sweetheart! I didn't realize how many friends I had. When thinking of places to stay, not a lot of names came to mind, but so many locals came through with offers. Some were people that I'd considered acquaintances and probably wouldn't have had the guts to ask in the first place, so the fact that they cared enough to reach out means a lot to me and I won't forget it. Thank you for making me feel less alone.



If it's not yet clear, David and I broke up after about two and a half years together. I'm not going to post too many details online; suffice it to say that we want different things out of life. I think I'm a better person for having known him, and now it's time to get to know myself. I haven't been single since I was seventeen. My life seems to have two extremes: amazing and pure hell, without much of an in-between. Either I'm happy and I love everyone, or it's the end of the world. Perhaps that's why he keeps calling me a tragic princess.

I won't lie, some parts of the single life are quite nice. I've been spending a lot more time with friends and exploring the city more, too. Yesterday, Vincent, Kit and I climbed all the way to the top of Mont Royal and it was my first time doing so since I moved here. We found a nice shady spot to sit and we made friends with random passersby. Stayed almost until the sun went down, it was lovely. Vincent and I have become much closer after what was essentially a two-week-long slumber party, where our lives consisted of nothing but free movies (Thanks, Netflix!), cat videos, root beer floats, 2am meals of pizza and poutine, shopping and endless conversations. I've also had the freedom to go on dates with girls, which is partly why the breakup happened anyway. There are some pretty lonely times too, but I feel at my best when I'm drinking tea with friends, so I try to do a lot of that (indeed, I am drinking a cup of peppermint tea with a friend as I type this).





I'd attempted to put Fight Boredom Distro on hiatus for the month, but I wasn't sure if people were actually reading the message on the site (or Facebook, or Etsy...) because the orders just kept on comin' in, so I've continued mailing them out, if a little slower than usual. If you've ordered any zines from me this month, they've been posted and I thank you. My apologies for not including nice notes - I simply don't have access to my supplies at the moment, not even note paper.

To the guy in England who mailed me some Polaroids in exchange for Culture Slut #19 and #23: I don't have copies of those issues anymore, but you can order 'em through these distros.

I've only had sporadic access to the internet, so zine reviews haven't exactly been at the top of my list of priorities, but they'll be back soon. I'm still collecting my mail and can tell you that the latest issues of Cheaptoys and Rum Lad are awesome (full disclosure: I contributed a piece to the latest issue of Rum Lad, and a portrait of me drawn by Steve appears as well).



Anyway, if you're in Montreal and you've had a secret crush on me, now would be the perfect time to ask me out on a date.